I lost my super hero powers

Since my MRI scans have come back good for the past few visits, I have been feeling invincible. I even thought about going back to school to get my BSN, so I could be a part time nurse when all of my kiddos are in school. This is something I wanted to do before I was diagnosed with brain cancer, but decided not to do it as soon as I was diagnosed, figuring that my time with my family was more important than my wanting a little job and some me time.


So my last MRI and visit with my oncologist, I realized that I am not invincible...

My oncologist saw my images and although he's always told me it's growing, even when we can't see the growth on the MRI, this time he said he could see the growth and estimated it as about 10 percent growth.

He suggested that I do radiation, which I still refuse to do. So, he would like me to do a year of chemo, which I am willing to do, after I get a second and third opinion. It's not that I don't trust my oncologist, because I completely do. But he is human and looking at these images with his eyes, so I'm guessing that it could be seen differently from another oncologist and I'd like to hear another opinion before I make a drastic change, like a year of chemo.

If I go the chemo route, I'm not going to start until September so that I can enjoy the summer with my kiddos without feeling sick. And my mom had a great suggestion as the chemo is in pill form, that I would take for 5 days every 28 day cycle for a year. She suggested that we sit down with a calendar and mark off all the dates I don't want to be on chemo, so that we can schedule those 5+ days at a time during the months that will not fall of holidays, birthdays, school breaks, etc.

I haven't told many people yet, because I have wanted to keep it on the down low, as my daughter, Faith, was finishing the last week of her senior year. She's seen us be back and forth on this for the last 2 years of her senior year, so I wanted her to just enjoy her last week like a normal high school student. Her graduation was wonderful, I'm a very proud mama and I'll post about it another time with pictures!!

As for now, just please keep me in your prayers and I'll try my best to keep you posted.